Oh yeah…on my birthday as well. Am I just a glutton for punishment…maybe. But my kids were long overdue a visit to see their grandparents and I was missing the food from home sooo much. Mr Su was on a long overdue extended work trip away so if I wanted to go, I was going to have to get myself there. I’m no stranger to travel, especially as an expat. I’ve taken to the skies solo with one baby before and let me tell you, that wasn’t exactly a walk in the park. The thoughts of taking two of them on a two-leg trip was daunting to say the least, but I convinced myself I could do it…and then I bottled it and rescheduled the trip 2 times at the eleventh hour (more on that later). I came so close to canceling the third time with 45 minutes to leave the house because my toddler had refused his nap and was having one of the biggest meltdowns I’ve ever witnessed. But after a pep talk from Mr Su and not wanting to miss out on Irish chocolate, I actually bit the bullet, put on my game face and lived to tell the tale! Was it a walk in the park? By no means. Was it exhausting? Yes. But was it as painstakingly awful as I had built it up to be in my head? No. And would I do it again? Yes, in fact I will be taking another trip solo with them in a few weeks. So it couldn’t have been that bad, right? I learned a lot on this first outing. In fact, the return leg was so much smoother despite a five hour flight delay because I tweaked a few things to do differently on the way back. If you’re considering traveling with your little ones soon (solo or not), here’s a few things I jotted down after the trip that I think helped.
A few things I’m glad I considered in advance…
As it wasn’t my first rodeo traveling with kids and given I spent my life pre-children racking up air miles for work, there’s a few things I made sure I considered ahead of time:
Picked a familiar airport that I already knew well to connect through minimising the risk of any surprises or having to spend time navigating my way around
I avoided peak days and times knowing that full flights and long queues were just going to cause extra stress.
I booked specific seats in advance - probably the single most important thing I could do to make the time on board as easy as possible. With two small squirming toddlers who want to be able to move around a bit without constraints, I always choose bulkhead seats where they have a little more legroom to stand up during the flight. That extra bit of space makes such a difference and gives them the perception at least of having a bit of freedom. I also look at the seat configuration and the aircraft and try to block the seats next to the window rather than the middle. If its a 2 4 2 configuration, I book the two seats so we have a little area of our own. If it’s a 3 3 3 configuration, I book the window and the aisle seat and hope that nobody else will opt to book that single seat in the middle. Worst case scenario if they do, we can always swap them into the aisle seat and stay together.
On the subject of seats, I also always try to book a bassinet seat where it’s available. Even though my youngest has almost outgrown it, having somewhere to put her down when she fell asleep was so convenient and even gave me an opportunity to eat something.
I booked a room at the airside hotel as we had a long layover and couldn’t face the idea of relying on them falling asleep in their strollers. The hotel room meant we have a bed and a cot and they were able to keep a little bit of consistency in their routine.
I know exactly what family facilities the airport had ahead of time and I used them (including a designed family security screening area for transiting passengers meaning we were able to get through security in peace and quiet away from the masses of people also transiting)
I was also very realistic about the journey and what I could / couldn’t handle
Flight times: At first we were booked on an early morning flight that would have kept the journey time to a minimum and got us to our destination at a decent time. However, it would have required both kids needing to be up at 4am and in the car by 4.30pm. In practice, this was just going to spell misery for the day ahead so I rethought our plans and rebooked to a late afternoon flight for the first short let, followed by an overnight stay at the airside hotel and an onward flight the next morning. It was far less disruptive on them despite it taking us longer to get there.
High fever meant a no-go: In the run up to this trip, both kids had been having the usual winter bugs (thanks to my son bringing every little germ home from nursery). We kept him home for the two weeks before we were due to travel to try and ensure they would both be fit and well for the trip. However on the first two attempts, he ended up waking up on those days, running a really high fever and low on energy - and on both occasions, I decided not to travel and rescheduled as I just knew it would have been miserable for everyone. Of course, it’s not always an option to shift flights around at the last minute but I’m glad we did in this instance.
No limits on screentime: I am by no means anti-screen time but I do try to limit it day to day and stick to the age-recommended guidelines. Without any hesitation, the exception to this is on traveling and all and any concerns and rules go out the window. Honestly, I wouldn’t have survived one flight let alone the others without the kids having access to a steady stream of Wheels on the Bus, Blippi and Elmo - and I was never more thankful to YouTube!
The double buggy was brought back out: There was a short time when the double buggy was a godsend especially as there’s only 14 months between my first two children. In recent months however, it has been gathering dust and we usually get by one some combo of walking, the BabyZen YoYo and sometimes the glider board that attaches to it. In my naivety, I thought this would be fine for the airport also but Mr Su. convinced me to dig out the big, bulky double buggy and boy was I glad to have it right from the get go. More storage space and more control over otherwise wandering little humans - I think I would have just given up and left the airport before we had even got on the plane if I didn’t have it.
I halved what I was carrying on the journey back: Having got caught out with no buggy being delivered to the gate when we landed at our destination and having to carry a 12kg toddler, navigate a 2 year old on foot while carrying 3 carry on bags full of stuff we didn’t use on the flight, I learned my lesson any only took one backpack plus a small kids backpack as carry-on on the way back. I had initially brought loads of books, small toys/games to keep them entertained on the flight. The reality is there were only interested in the iPad and so that’s more or less all we took on the way back for entertainment.
The really nitty gritty practical stuff that made life easier
Packing your carry-on bags as light as possible. Like I said above, ditching the bags full of games and entertainment in favour of a fully loaded iPad was a complete game-changer.
Download every game, video, song your kids love ahead of time for offline viewing. The double check it has downloaded. Then triple check it works when your device has no internet / phone connection.
Have a small wristlet travel pouch where you can keep your passports / boarding passes / PCR tests, etc. to hand and within easy reach.
Pack your carry on bags so that they are ready to go for security as quickly and easily as possible. Put all liquids together and have a separate bag for baby food / bottles, etc. Have iPads ready to pull out quickly and easily. Make sure there’s nothing loose in the stroller compartments. Wear slip on shoes.
Have a multi-compartment backpack with a designated compartment for all essentials to be in easy reach. For example, pacifiers in a front pocket that you can reach into easily.
Have a power pack and the necessary charging cables for your devices. CocoMelon on tap can quickly run down a phone battery!
Know how you will transport the kids through the airport - make sure you can take your stroller to the gate / on board. Take your carrier as a backup if it doubt. Make sure the airline knows you want the stroller delivered to the door at your destination and make sure in advance they can do this for you.
Have a steady stream of snacks available and within easy reach.
If you are sitting in a bulkhead seat, you will most likely need to put your bags overhead for takeoff and landing. Know what you need (e.g. milk, pacifier, ipad and have it ready to pull out of your bag before the crew make you put everything else away)
For the essentials on what to pack in your flight bag when traveling with toddlers, check out my customizable checklist.
Little things you may not think of but may make your life a lot easier in the moment:
Double check the seat allocations on your boarding card when you check in. I’ve learned this the hard way. Even when you book seats in advance, the airline may make changes without communicating them to you. Twice, I’ve collected my boarding passes only to discover late that my two year old son has been put in a seat a few rows away from me. Not something you want to be resolving with customer service between flights with tired children in tow.
Have a clear plan laid out for when you get to your destination. Trust me, the last thing you want to be dealing with after after what will probably feel like 10 years of travelling is rummaging through a full to the brim suitcase trying to find pyjamas for your overtired toddler or reaching your destination with hangry little humans in tow and not knowing what you’re going to feed them. A little bit of strategic packing (e.g. pyjamas and bedtime gear at the top of the suitcase) or advanced planning (like having a food or supermarket delivery scheduled close to your arrival time) will keep you hanging in there long enough to get those little ones settled in as quickly as possible.
Consider arranging lounge access if you can. If you’ve got multiple diapers to change or need to get a meal into your kids or have them take a nap, having a little bit more space to work with is generally worth every penny. Research the lounges at your specific airport ahead of time and see what has the best facilities and reviews for families.
Look into an upgrade if your budget permits. Some airlines offer upgrades on the day for a fraction of the cost of a business class ticket. More space is always a bonus and generally the crew are better able to assist you. A word of warning if you do upgrade however - make sure the seats on offer are suitable for your needs (e.g. are you foregoing a much needed bassinet if you upgrade?)
Check out the airport’s facilities for families. Some of the bigger and newer hubs such as Istanbul have some really well thought out family facilities such a separate security areas and mobility support, both of which I wish I had known about sooner.
Have a Plan B for your stroller in case it doesn’t show up to the gate. I learned this lesson the hard way and still have the pulled muscle in my back to prove it. I will now be taking my trusty BabyZen YoYo on board with me even if I also have the double buggy. It’s so compact that it folds up and fits into the basket underneath the double buggy meaning I will never have to carry it one way or the other.
Don’t forget to take care of YOURSELF - a little basic self-care will go a long way here. In all the chaos of getting the kids, suitcases out the door, it’s highly likely that anything Mamma needs won’t make the cut. Don’t leave the house and start this journey on an empty stomach. It’s ultimately going to create MORE stress so do yourself a favour and eat a proper meal before you leave the house and make sure you are staying well hydrated throughout your journey.
Finally and most importantly, some universal truths when it comes to traveling with kids:
Meltdowns will be inevitable especially with toddlers. It can be daunting, unsettling and confusing for their little brains as well so try to cut them a bit of slack (easier said than done) and be understanding if and when it all gets a bit too much for them.
Bribe as much as you need to…with whatever it takes, and don’t feel bad about it. In my humble experience, there’s very little bargaining to be done with a cranky toddler who decides they want to unbuckle their seatbelt and take a walk just as the plane is turning on to the runway. Whipping out the iPad or having an extra special snack treat (or five) on hand may help you navigate away from those moments where you feel like you’re losing all control.
Yes, it will be very tough at times (think being squeezed into a tiny airplane bathroom with two little ones trying to change one diaper while stopping the other from touching the toilet). However it won’t be as bad as you think and remember it’s all temporary and hopefully it will have been worth it when you get to your destination.
That’s all I can think of. If you’re thinking about traveling with kids but unsure of how you’ll manage, check out these resources that will hopefully help to make your trip that bit more predictable and easy.
Bon voyage!
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